fell apart again today

sitting alone in the bathroom

on a sunny day

couldn’t stop the tears from flowing



should have but didn’t

and can’t change it now


this time last year

I believed

everything would be ok

you would be ok

this was just a blip

and all would be well eventually

I watched other patients

who had beaten the disease

and I believed you would be one of them


but things turned horribly wrong

and now you’re gone

and I am sitting in the bathroom

sobbing uncontrollably

reliving the last year over in my mind


I told you to believe

to not give up hope

I kept saying you would beat this

even when you knew you wouldn’t

you kept trying

you didn’t want to die

you didn’t want to leave us


you ask me to bring you home

said it would only be a few days

you knew

but I didn’t bring you home

you trusted me

and I let you down

I couldn’t make this right

no matter how hard I tried


so hard to accept that we won’t ever see you again

so many things I should have said and done

now it is too late

and the tears flow again


© Tallulah 2012


About Tallulah

Writer, Photographer, Artist. Animal Welfare Advocate. Wildlife and Environmental Advocate.
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